Authenticity & Rapport by Alina Rodriguez, NCFCA Alumna

I can remember listening to the national champions of NCFCA, Stoa, and other national debate leagues — clicking on their published YouTube videos highlighted in their online hall of fame. Not because I was bored, but rather, in order to take meticulous notes on the things that they did well, from their organizational tactics down to the funny phrases that embodied their personal style. And while this helped me for a little while, I began to notice something that I found reflected in my ballots when it was my turn to approach the podium: “You sound canned, overprepared, preachy, even.” It was phrases like these that caused me to realize that my openness to learning and to inspiration from others who had done well before me was turning into a crutch and stripping me of my greatest tool, my own voice — the only resource that would help me to build a real relationship with the other person sitting at the table across from me. 

Authenticity and rapport are often words that we focus on as an afterthought as debaters and speakers — we are passionate about our research, have subscribed to every possible think tank, and learned how to use the table of contents function on Google Docs for our perfectly formatted brief. We have cut the cards for apologetics and even included quotes from our favorite, obscure Bible commentaries for bonus points. However, how many of us have read our judging feedback only to think, “I had better things to say, they just said their things better than me!” This should not be a phrase that we use dismissively, but rather a call to action that highlights our need to improve our ability to communicate. And communication begins with our authenticity, which builds rapport. 

First, authenticity cannot be copied. We can learn organizational tactics and gather stylistic inspiration from others, but your authentic presence can only be cultivated through repetitive practice. In my experience, I have found that recording myself and rewatching my recordings multiple times has helped me to view myself from a third-party perspective, looking and listening for the things that I repeat and do that are uniquely my own, whether its the way I use my hands, the way I form sentences, or the phrases (other than filler phrases, which we weed out) that are stylistically my own. 

Second, authenticity speaks for itself. Often, in our competitive efforts, we can tend to go on “presenter mode”, imagining that this is more impressive than our own selves. However, there is a difference between “presenter mode” and “professional mode”. To be professional is a non-negotiable, to carry ourselves with respect, and to respect others. However, in my experience, falling into the rut of “presenter mode” means that we often lose not only our ability to persuade and inform intriguingly, but run the risk of seeming false, fake, or throwing the contents of our speech into question. “Does she truly mean what she says? Does she believe this?” wonders the judge. Authenticity, on the other hand, is not merely a tool for speaking with pathos (with feeling), but bolsters our content with a foundation of trustworthiness. 

For this reason, authenticity builds rapport. When our listener (in the debate world, the judge) experiences our authenticity, this experience builds trust, which establishes rapport, the nonverbal relationship we share with the judge in the room. Since judges can trust us, they can trust the contents that we share with them. Whether authenticity makes us more confident, more amicable, more somber, more peaceful, or more relaxed, our judge is prepared to engage with us as a person, and now the contents of our speech matter in the context of the relationship we have with them. In my experience, speaking from my heart and allowing my style and personality to be present even in a serious debate speech has allowed me to connect with a light easiness with judges over topics as nuanced as the inner workings of an immigration system or as tense as imminent international conflict in the Middle East. 

Finally, building rapport creates a dialogue. In the world of speech and debate, yes, but especially once we leave the debate bubble, we often find ourselves in positions where it seems we are being asked yet again “to talk at people”. However, my experience radically shifted when I realized that I was being extended the opportunity to talk with people, even if I am the only one talking. When the relationship has been built, and I am engaging with another person as myself, I find that I am more likely to anticipate the questions they might raise and speak accordingly, I am cognizant of their body language and facial expressions to cue me. I am not reciting information from the air, I am sharing a passion in the hopes of their reciprocation. Whether it is as simple as responding positively to a head nod from them (“and yes, from this place of agreement we can go to our next point…”) or to a look of confusion (“and perhaps this is difficult to understand, but I hope it becomes clearer…”). And this dialogue can only begin when we bring ourselves into the room. 

In the end, speech and debate might seem like a mere hobby, a high school extracurricular for the resume. And yes, some people go on to pursue it as a life calling, while others follow life paths seemingly unrelated (I for one am pursuing counseling and play in a worship band). However, the lessons and habits that I built then have proven themselves to be lifelong. Authenticity and rapport are particularly relevant to cultivate now, because they engrain themselves in the way we talk, act, and engage in a professional setting. 

So now, I am grateful for the published YouTube videos that I used to watch, if only for the way that they encouraged me to find my own voice, style, and strategies that have helped me to stay honest and build relationships, both in the professional world in and in my daily life — whether in expressing encouragement in my workplace, sharing about my church experiences with a curious friend, or conveying my worldview with a hostile relative. And these experiences are where all of our practice culminates in its true test, the test of character. And no ballot can compare with this worth.